thrown by ladies

I really, REALLY enjoyed the Olympics, Particularly revisiting the sports I'd forgotten existed in the interim four years.

Fencing is definitely one of those sports, I find it utterly bewildering, lots of prancing and lunging with rapid scoring that I, literally never spot.

To the commentators I'm witnessing fencing excellence with moves of great skill, to me I'm seeing them take turns to run at one another whilst holding a bendy sword.

I had a bendy sword as a child, (no jokes!)great fun it was, I guess there in lies the attraction. I wonder if the olympian fencers are also pretending to be pirates?

Then there's the judo. I love judo, I did it as a child albeit briefly. I got thrown all over the place, all the while laughing like a drain. You see, I went with my friend Eddie, a large lad who's ma had sent along to help lose weight. The 3 packets of crisps he'd eat afterwards somewhat mitigating her hopes.

Now Eddie was a grumpy child who loved the strength his bulk gave him and particularly using it on his friends, so, to see him being thrown round the mat by a girl, was hilarious.
He ALWAYS got paired with a tall teenage girl, some 4 or 5 years older than us.
I could'nt concentrate on myself for laughing at Eddie. This is MY excuse for being thrown around by a ginger lad. I mention his hair only as a point of reference, I love ginger folk....

For me now, some years later, the thought of being thrown by a sporty lady has its appeal...as long as its onto a bed.....for the soft landing you understand.

Well now, thanks to Olympic focus I once again know what an Ippon is, I forget in the interim periods and have to have it explained to me again every 4 years. I feel almost guilty that I pay so little attention otherwise but, really the difference between that and the other moves is negligible to my untrained eye.

Its the same with a multitude of other sports, if you told me I'd be gripped by the womens weightlifting I'd have said you were off your head!

Its big ladies lifting stuff, where's the attraction?. Well, the attractions there and I'll tell you what, the women these days are often fine looking ladies! Not that that is important, I mention it only to emphasise my surprise. I remember the days of East German weightlifting 'ladies' with a shudder.

A confusion for me in the judo is the constant state of undress. They spend an inordinate amount of time and energy repeatedly having to readjust disaassembled clothing, I'm like that myself, my trousers forever needing adjustement but, in a high paced sport shouldn't they wear something a bit more sensible?

Those huge jackets are like dressing gowns. I could turn up at the venue wearing a hotel dressing gown and they'd probably let me compete! Not that I'd want to appear on television in my dressing gown, its forever flopping open, what would the BBC think!

As for BMX, I want one! I want one now, I want to ride that mad course up and down those humps and bumps. Granted the last time I rode one....1984 ish...I flipped off a ramp and damaged my groin of all things, but I'll give it a go!

I might feel a little daft to be fair, grown man and all riding a dinky little bike but, with Rio only 4 years away....now what can I use to build me a ramp?.